My Ex-Husband (part 4).

If you're just stopping by, you can catch up by starting here, then going here, and finally going here.

Alright!  Where did I leave off?  Right, so we were living the good life, exploring California and I was making friends!  Though our first year was full of trials and tribulations, we survived it, and in the end I think it made us so much stronger.  Then, as we got into the second year, things started taking a weird twist.

My Ex-Husband was becoming less interested in doing activities.  One of the guys in his shop played this game World of Warcraft (here on out referred to as WoW) and had a blast playing it.  My Ex-Husband wanted to try it out so he bought it and was pretty interested in it.  At first I really didn't mind, I had my BFF and other people to hang out with, so while he was playing that I was able to keep myself occupied doing other things.  And in March of 2006 my sister flew out to Cali and we all went to Vegas!  It was really fun, except I could tell that something was weird with My Ex-Husband.  Come to find out later it was that he was basically having withdrawals from not playing WoW.  I'd say late March/early April was when I really started seeing a change in him.  He became very withdrawn, never wanted to hang with our friends on the weekends, never wanted to go to LA or San Diego, nothing.  All he wanted to do was sit his ass in front of the computer and play WoW.  Like I said, at first it didn't bother me, but a person can only take so much neglect.  So when it got to the point where when he came home from work he'd instantly sit at the computer, BDU's and combat boots still on, I knew this was going to be a bad thing.  He would ask me to serve him dinner at the computer, he'd stay up until the wee hours of the morning playing, even though he had to be up early for work the next day.  That was his life now.  I guess because it's a fantasy world and it was more interesting than the real world.  There was this feature on the game where you could "chat" with the people on your team or whatever through a microphone.  So he got a headset that had a mic and headphones on it.  I can't tell you how many times I'd be watching tv ALONE and he'd saying something so I'd say "what babe?" and he'd point to the mic on his headset.  Oh...I should've known you weren't talking to me.

This went on for months, it got so tiring for me to watch TV alone and be rejected when I wanted to have sex with him because he was "in the middle of a raid, just 10 more minutes" that I'd just hang out with my BFF all the time.  Which, of course, then he blamed me that I was hanging out with her too much and I was becoming different.  Uhhh...no, I'm just distancing myself from you because you'd rather fuck around on the computer than be a husband to your wife.  By the time July rolled around we were really bad.  We'd just moved into a newer house on base because ours were old and being torn down, and we were barely speaking...and obviously having no sex.  Right before we'd moved out of the house I told him I wasn't happy, we got into a huge fight at one point and he locked me in the bathroom with him so my BFF's husband couldn't come pick me up and take me away.  Then a few days later he came home from work and suggested we have a baby.  Oh, ok!  Because that will solve all of our problems, having another person for you to neglect, and leave me to be a single mother.  I'm ok, thanks.

I decided to take a vaca to visit a friend, but when my BFF went to take me to the airport, the ONE road to the airport (literally one road to get to this airport) was shut down because a tanker had turned over.  So, instead of a vaca away from Cali I just stayed at my BFF's house.  We got away for a few days and visited her dad's house in San Louis Obispo, which actually excited me because to get there you have to take the road that James Dean was driving on when he died.  I'm am in love with James Dean.  I digress.  My Ex-Husband found out that I wasn't actually out of town (he called the airline because I wouldn't tell him where I was going) and told me I needed to help him clean out our old house so it would pass inspection.  I decided to just do it, I wasn't trying to be ugly.  He picked me up and we headed over there, on the way I asked him if he could please take that game off the computer, he said yes.  I was excited, but I felt it was too good to be true, so I asked if he was serious and he said "hah, no."  Really nice, right?!  That's how much I apparently meant to him.  He chose a computer game over his own wife, the woman he swore he'd love forever.  I couldn't take it anymore, it was just too much.  Does anyone know what it's like to have a game picked over you?  How it feels to be an actual living, breathing human being and a stupid $50 GAME somehow seems better than you?  Well, it doesn't feel good.  I know people are probably thinking that it's easy to control that, that I should've told him he couldn't keep his subscription (you have to pay a monthly fee), but he made his own money and as much as I pushed him to delete it, he obviously didn't want to.  I really don't know how I could've forced him to stop.

We filed for divorce just short of our 2 year anniversary.  And in the state of CA it takes 6 months and a day from the day that you file for it to be finalized.  We went through a legal service to take care of all the headache of it and in March 2007 we were officially divorced.  I make that sound so easy.  It wasn't.  I had to deal with so much fuss from him the whole time until it was final.  He harassed me all the time, calling me a whore, saying I cheated on him.  Ohhhh ok, so now it's all MY fault?!  Ridiculous.  He actually told his parents that, so they basically never wanted to have anything to do with me.  I actually kinda feel like that hurt more than breaking it off with him because his parents were always such a positive part of my life and they weren't the ones who did me wrong.  To this day he tells people that he thinks I cheated on him.  Awful.  I realize he had to make something up to make him not look like the piece of shit who ruined our marriage, but come on!  You couldn't come up with something else?  That's a little dramatic.

So, that's the shortened version of my short lived marriage!  The funny thing is that we actually became civil with each other about 2 years ago and things seemed to be looking up for a bit.  He toyed with the idea of us getting back together...I won't lie, I considered it once he brought it up.  He even sent me flowers and a teddy bear for V-Day last year and I sent him a card...but then he goes back to being his childish self and I realize that I can't stand to deal with a child.

Next relationship we'll discuss is The Rebound.

xoxo,
Me